Episode 003- Becoming Your Dream Self: Permission to Thrive Today
In this episode of “Conscious Transformation,” we dive deep into the journey of becoming your dream self. Are you a high-performing, highly productive woman at risk of burnout? Join me as I share my personal journey and guide you through practical steps to refocus on what truly matters to you. Learn how to visualize your ideal life, challenge limiting beliefs, and start embodying the traits of your highest self today. It’s time to give yourself permission to thrive and create a life you absolutely love. Tune in and transform your reality now.
One of the first things to do is to think about the “who you want to be” that will make you deeply happy. I’m talking about your highest self, the ideal you, in this very moment. Not the you in five or ten years, but who you want to be today. When you put a time frame on your goals, you train your mind to think that you can’t achieve them now. But the truth is, you can.
When I first did this exercise, I wrote down who I wanted to be in five years and ten years and believe it or not… in 20 years. But then I realized some of those traits and behaviours were things I could adopt right now and then I started to realize I would actually like to have that me, now. Who was I delaying my joy for? Did I somehow think I needed to fulfil a role for someone else? If my highest joy and peace was being kicked down the road for my 60’s what was I thinking?
I could create the life I want then, now, there are character traits and energies that I can channel today. Sure, I can’t switch my life instantaneously overnight, but I can start embodying them immediately and start the ball rolling on synchronicities, opportunities and the process of creation.
So, write down everything—the life you want to be living, the freedom, the peace, the luxury or the nature. Give yourself permission to go wild, think about your if only dreams, think about what you want to have achieved when it’s your time to pass on, don’t waste anymore time. I think somewhere deep down I was waiting, I was fulfilling a role. I was a young mum and have had many challenging experiences in my life so I was so focused on providing and being a carer, that I had not looked up. I hadn’t given myself the time of day needed to plan what I actually want. I was so driven and focused on building the right financial situation for my family that I had not conceived that I could have both the financial abundance and be doing something that fulfilled my hopes and dreams.
So this is your opportunity – the knock on the door that I wish I had had 10 years ago, to get you to rethink your direction and double check that it is actually what you want. So, go into detail focusing on everything, where would you be living, what it would look like, what you would be doing within the day, what experiences would you like to have. How would your days be filled and what would you like to be your service to others in exchange for this freedom, peace and abundance. Focus on your character traits, on your values, on your time. On your experiences.
And think through what can you apply to your now as part of the creation process? How would you like to dress? What kind of people do you want to surround yourself with? What kind of partner do you want to be with if not so already? What places do you want to go to, explore or casually visit regularly? These are all things you can start practicing now.
Often, we go through life on autopilot because we haven’t updated what we want and who we want to be. If your ideal self wouldn’t accept half the stuff you’re dealing with now, why are you accepting it? And here’s a crucial point: if you don’t write it down, it’s just a thought. It’s not a strategic goal.
When I sat down to write my list, it was like a flow of thoughts I wasn’t even aware of to begin with and I had to adapt my list a couple of times as I gradually stretched my goals, expanding what what I subconsciously could expect I could get easily, to again rethinking and pushing my boundaries to actually what did I want, not what did I think I could get.
It’s essential to give yourself the chance to sit down and let it all come out. Organize your thoughts. After you figure out what your dream self actually looks like, start being intentional about everything in your life.
Being intentional means assessing it all against your goals. Look at what you fill your days with, who you fill your days with and the actions or activities you participate in. If these are in contrast to your newly defined goals then outline what would it be replaced with if you were already your dream self?
When you plan for something you can consciously start to progress towards it and at the same time because of our natural Reticular Activating System (also known as RAS) once you are aware of something, and in this case your newly defined goals, your consciousness brings things that are like it, support it or can move you in the direction, to your attention more often. Which is the same thing as when you buy a new car, you now see that car everywhere… or if you think you might be pregnant, you see pregnant women everywhere!
Once you have defined your dream self, you essentially have kicked the process of creation and you can now expand and build upon that reality.
And through my personal experience I have found that life itself starts to support your new process. Like a seed finding water in the soil, it attracts what it needs and grows towards the surface, to feel the sunlight. Your new dreams will be supported when you define your goals, act as if they are already there, show gratitude for having what you want and feel as if you have already achieved them, doors will open for you. You will find yourself at the right time and place, someone will call you and open another door for you to explore.
When I decided to make new friends, I first found a few amazing new friends who were exactly what I was looking for. It was as if the universe was aligning to bring these wonderful people into my life. Soon, I found myself overwhelmed with opportunities to socialize and connect with others. It was an incredible feeling to have such an abundance of meaningful connections and all because I changed my plan and included it.
Similarly, when I decided to build my new passion business, it felt like everything I needed appeared at just the right moment. The right people, conversations, tools. I was surrounded by everything that I needed, I just needed to apply myself and take action. Every time I needed guidance or assistance, it was right there at my fingertips. This overwhelming abundance made it clear to me that when you set clear intentions and pursue your passions with purpose, the universe conspires to support you.
But it’s not just about adding new things into your life, it’s also about making space for them. It’s essential to let go of things that no longer serve you or your best self. As you make a list of the new qualities, goals, and traits you want to explore, it’s equally important to identify the old habits, thoughts, and behaviours that you need to release.
I made some time to sit down and write a comprehensive list of the qualities and habits I wanted to shed. This process was really helpful because it enabled me to become more aware of the aspects of my life that were holding me back. By consciously identifying these traits, I activated my Reticular Activating System (RAS), which made me more mindful of my behaviors and thoughts and this awareness was the first step towards change.
It can be as simple as making a list of all the qualities you’d like to let go of. This list serves as a tangible reminder of what you’re working to release from your life. Your RAS will help you become more conscious of these traits, enabling you to recognize them when they arise and work on letting them go.
I needed to get a lot better at setting boundaries, boundaries for myself and my time but also with other people.. By writing these down, I was able to focus on releasing people pleasing and reduce multitasking juggling a little bit more from my life.
It’s really crucial to approach this process with self-compassion. Don’t hold onto regret or berate yourself for past mistakes. Instead, practice self-forgiveness. Understand that everyone has aspects of themselves they wish to improve. The key is to acknowledge these traits without judgment and focus on creating and embodying the qualities you want. For me, this meant forgiving myself for the times I had been too hard on myself and recognizing that I am a work in progress. It also meant celebrating small victories along the way, as I noticed improvements and shifts in my mindset and behaviour.
As you go through this transformative journey, remember to be patient with yourself. Change takes time, and it’s essential to honor your progress, no matter how small it may seem. Each step you take towards embodying your ideal self is a step towards living your best life.
Now as you start to work on defining your best self, you have to get familiar with the things you want to create or to attached into your life. So spend time looking at your goals, try them on for size, look at the houses or cars you might want to own. Consider what lifestyle habits you will have and do your best to test them out and experience them so that you can test if they will be the right fit for you. Now is your time to test and learn, before they are here. And it has the added bonus of helping you to attract them into your life and create your reality by experiencing those things. But don’t stress if you are unable to try them on for size physically, you can do so with your mind. Go online and look for inspirations and set aside some time to really think through and use your imagination to test out and adapt your goals. But remember when you do, you’ll most likely come across some limiting beliefs that create a ceiling or limit on your expectations, so watch out for them. Make sure you question the beliefs because they are notoriously difficult to spot for the person who has them. Ask yourself is this the best I would want, would I want any bigger? If I could have anything, what would I choose?
So in short, give yourself the permission you need to think big, think now what you want to feel at the end. Allow yourself the freedom to choose without any restrictions, obligations or limits. Write your dreams and desires down and then make a list of what you can implement today, what you can look at and surround yourself with today. Then trust in the process. Be grateful everyday, visualise your dream life, look over and over your goals and dream life and then when opportunities come up or are presented to you. This is your time to act quickly, as quickly and as deeply as you can.
Thank you for listening and if you enjoyed this episode and want more, feel free to join my free online community called Conscious Transformation. Don’t forget to share this episode with friends and subscribe for more.
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